I know, amor, that the world pushes you by the back to go, to live the day, to eat, to solve the little things, to continue to think about the bodily needs and the worldly order. But the hole in the heart wants your attention, to dive in it, to hide in its darkness where you can cry and make the time stop as it should be...
Stop, time! And let us grieve. Let our tears dry our eyes, let our voice sing the pain, let our mind visit all the moments with him, let our heart scream the love for him, let the fire of sadness burn and from its ashes build a future... A future without his presence, but not without him...
I know it hurts, but I also know that I don't know how much it hurts... I can hear the voice of the child crying for his father, the strength of the man trying to live the life that pushes him, the love of the brother who is smiling to warm his brothers' innocent hearts, the loyalty of the son who is giving his shoulder, his arms, his everything to the halved mother...
I feel helpless to ease your suffering...And I would give anything to protect your divine heart from this sorrow... But I can't... I can only hug you and kiss you and love you. But not to try to compensate for the hole that is inside you, but to make you feel that I am here by your side. With all that I am... I will be by your side to cry, to remember, to enjoy him beyond death : trough his art and through you, trough everything that taught you and through everything you are because of him.
I know it hurts, but I also know that I don't know how much it hurts... The earth keeps moving, the stars keep shining, the people lost in their world push the life forward. And we will stop time, embrace the shadow of pain and forget the world, to let the waves of tears wash us and prepare us for new steps... Without his presence, but not without him...
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